Read ‘n Respond: “Pagan Christianity?” by Frank Viola & George Barna

I’m currently reading a book called “Pagan Christianity?: Exploring the Roots of Our Church Practices” by Frank Viola & George Barna. And, while it’s a really interesting book, with a lot of good points, I’m a bit disturbed by some of the things they’re saying. My internal warning bells are going off, big time.

For example…

On page 116, the authors write, “The non-New Testament concept of sacerdotalism — the belief that there exists a divinely appointed person to mediate between God and the people — originated with Cyprian [of Carthage].“

But, I beg to differ! In the Old Testament, God did appoint mediators… He gave the Israelites the high priests that were the go-betweens between God & His people. They were the ones who entered the Holy of Holies at specific times to make atonement for the peoples’ sins (see Leviticus 16:1-34). Moses was also a mediator between God and His people. He was the only one allowed to go up the mountain to meet with God, and receive instruction (see Exodus 19).

Originally, I also had issue with the fact that the authors were claiming that the church building was something we shouldn’t have. I thought, “But we’re to meet together with other believers (Heb.10:25), so we need a place to gather“. But, then they clarified that the church’s architecture is made to elicit a response… it teaches us “what the church is, and how it functions” (p.37).

And, their talk about how a pastor is a hinderance also got up my ire. They claim that there’s no mention of a pastor in the Bible. And, I thought, “But it does talk about shepherding God’s people, and leadership. (see 1 Timothy 3 and Ezekiel 34:1-10).” But, then I realized that, even though it talks about shepherds leading God’s people, that also could mean anyone in the church who is gifted with leadership. And the authors then clarified that “shepherds” refers to people who have a natural talent for nurturing and caring for God’s people.

So, I don’t know… I’m still reading this book with a spirit of discernment, and I’m taking it with a grain of salt. I’m thinking that I will take what I love from this book, and then just disregard the rest.

There’s a lot of it that I do agree with, mind you. Like how the authors say that our fixed pews and our stage make it seem like we church-goers are passive spectators on Sunday mornings, and the pastor is providing the “entertainment”. They talk about how –in an organic/home-church– the members would all be able to contribute to the sharing of God’s Word. Whoever feels led to share a word they’ve received could do so. And, everyone would be able to look their fellow members in the eyes easily… not having to strain around to see behind them in a pew.

I also agree that the word “church” should refer not to a building, but to all of God’s people. That’s how it’s meant in the Bible, after all. The Greek word is “ekklesia“, meaning “a gathering of believers“.

More thoughts to come as I continue reading…

Beth Moore’s “Esther“: Weeks 1-4

 My church’s ladies’ Bible study group has been working their way through Beth Moore’s study of the book of “Esther“, subtitled “It’s Tough Being a Woman“. And, man, is it ever good! I’m learning so much!

So, I thought I’d give you a little bit of a taste of what I’ve been learning! Here are the quotes I’ve gotten from weeks 1-4, plus the introduction…

INTRODUCTION

“Providence” = nothing happens by chance

- What God’s Word says is TRUE… what I’m feeling is not necessarily true. For example: If I feel that God isn’t present with me, that’s a LIE! God’s Word says that God will “never leave me or forsake me”.

I found it interesting that… Esther marries a PAGAN king and then stays (and lives) in a PAGAN nation –> this makes me think of my own life, married to an unbeliever, and having a good number of unbelieving family members.

- it’s not so much our story as it is God’s story ~ and it becomes ours as He writes us into it.

- the Bible is full of stories where it seems like everything is hopeless, but then God saves the day so that His glory can be revealed (eg. Abraham sacrificing Isaac; Moses’ entire life!; Joseph being sold into slavery; Shadrach/Meshach/Abednego being thrown into the furnace; Jesus’ death on the cross; etc).

- the most freeing thing we can ever do is to abdicate the thrown of our own miniature kingdoms

- we have a sovereign God who reigns over all and is threatened by NONE

WEEK ONE

* “You cannot amputate your history from your destiny“

- don’t ever forget what God dragged you out of!

- repetition in Scripture usually means that God is making a point

- every time a Biblical character is mentioned for the first time, you can be sure there’s something important to learn

- I found it interesting… that Esther grew up without her dad being present… like me!

- God sometimes allows our confusion to coax us into further study of the entire Word. Only by measuring actions by other Scripture can we clarify right and wrong in certain morally ambiguous narratives.

- …some events remain gray to us regardless of our search through other Scriptures, leaving us without definitive ways to measure them. At those times, we might assume that God means to teach us a historical or spiritual lesson more than an ethical or moral one.

- that’s why God is busy conforming us into the likeness of Christ alone. None of the rest of us can bear the burden of constancy.

- we, too, can become so steeped in our culture that we are almost indistinguishable from the world. We, too, can lose our sense of identity and forget who we are.

- we who comprise the His bride will make ourselves ready for the King through nothing less than the soul-healing pursuit of purity.

WEEK TWO

* “Insecurity is at the heart of every rivalry.”

- there’s nothing meaner than a coward

- you’ll never be more prone to the enemy’s attack than when God has set you free from some sort of captivity, but you’re still on the raod to your ‘promised land’ (when you’re weary and frazzled from the journey).

- meanness ALWAYS has a history –> it doesn’t just come out of nowhere

- 2 Corinthians 10:12 says that comparing ourselves to others is foolish … comparing leads us to feel threatened, in some way, which brings out our inner “mean girl”

- we need to learn to identify the threat, and then let God deal with it!

WEEK THREE

- sackcloth & ashes symbolized not only the Jews’ povery of spirit before the Lord, but their complete deadness without Him

- an in-depth approach to Scripture changes so much! The Holy Spirit ends up unearthing hidden treasures and shedding light on details that make a narrative spring to life in a way that casual reading can’t.

- …strength comes from muscle, and muscle develops with a workout. This is as true spiritually as physically. What we don’t use, we lose!

- when our old priorities don’t go with our new life, we either return to our old life, or adopt new priorities.

- priests of the Tabernacle would fast for 3 days to get ready to receive the Holy Spirit before entering the Holy of Holies… perhaps this is why Esther called for a 3-day fast with all of the Jews before approaching King Xerxes with her request.

WEEK FOUR

- the most frequent command, given by God, in the Bible is… DON’T BE AFRAID!!!

- you can be brave!

- we can be one decision away from completely changing our outcome

- my current choices may have an impact on my destiny

- we’ll never know the abundant life (John 10:10) until we’re free from the grip of fear

- “COURAGE” comes from the Latin word, “cor“, meaning “heart“

- Christ offers us the courage of His presence… make sure you take it! (“Take heart…”, He says)

- Proverbs 31:10 – “A wife of noble character, who can find?“… term “noble character” is the same as the Greek word, translated “valor“, meaning “BRAVE“. Therefore, a “brave” woman is “more precious than rubies“.

 

Leaving Organized Religion, Part 2

In my last post, I talked about how I feel God has shown me that I don’t need to go to church… it’s not a Biblical mandate. The Bible only says that we aren’t to neglect meeting together with other believers (Heb.10:25).

Well, I don’t want to give you the wrong impression… I might leave the church — meaning the Sunday morning services, or a specific congregation — but I won’t be leaving the faith. I am just tired of trying to live up to the man-made rules of religion.

Wayne Jacobsen (author of “So You Don’t Want to Go to Church Any More“), in this article, puts it this way:

Many people giving up on local institutions are not doing so because they’ve rejected Jesus, but finding that the culture of Christianity is actually diminishing their faith not enhancing it.

I’ve always felt really guilty for not keeping up with the “spiritual disciplines”: prayer, fasting, Scripture reading, etc. I do read my Bible from time-to-time (though, not as consistently as I should), and my prayer life is fairly active… I pray off and on throughout every day, little prayers sent up about this or that. But I don’t sit down do have “quiet time” with God, normally, and that makes me feel like a “bad Christian”.

While I realize that the spiritual disciplines are important, I also now realize that I was trying to make them into a “law”, more than a loving, grace-based action. If it doesn’t flow naturally from my love for God, then it’s law, IMHO. We should be so in love with our Lord that we naturally want to spend time with Him, and learn from Him, and grow towards being more like Him. Or, at least, that’s how I see it.

For me, I feel pressured by other Christians to always be striving in my faith. But, faith isn’t supposed to be about striving. It’s supposed to be about relationship; about letting Christ live out His purposes through us. Unfortunately, I never feel “good enough” when I’m around other Christians. I always feel like they are looking down on me because I don’t make it to church every Sunday, or don’t participate in church events, or don’t serve in some way at the church. I don’t DO enough. But, again, it’s not supposed to be about trying to please others.

As I said above, if you’re in a relationship with God, and He’s given the freedom to live out His purposes through you, then you’re going to be serving, or acting out the other disciplines of the Christian faith… they’ll just flow naturally from that relationship. It won’t be forced.

In the same article mentioned above, Wayne Jacobsen says this:

We were promised a relationship with God but were handed a religion of doctrines we had to believe, rituals we had to observe, obligations we had to meet and a standard of morality to adopt. While most of those were true enough, many found that their attempts to follow them did not produce either the life of Jesus it promised, nor the reality of true, caring communities of faith.

And, again, this is where I relate. I don’t feel like I’m growing in my faith — only being stunted by the “rules of the game”, and by the condemnation received from those around me. To quote Rob Bell, in his “Sunday” NOOMA video, “God doesn’t want the meaningless rituals… God wants our hearts“.

“The eyes of the Lord search the whole earth in order to strengthen
those whose hearts are fully committed to him.” ~ 2 Chronicles 16:9a

So, I’m not going to let those things condemn me any more… I am going to live in the freedom Christ is showing me, knowing I don’t have to follow man-made traditions. I can continue to meet with other believers, both at Bible study, and in one-on-one visits with Christian friends. And, I can continue to pursue a loving relationship with my Lord… just apart from “organized religion”.

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then,
and do not let yourselves be burdened again by
a yoke of slavery.~ Galatians 5:1, NIV

Leaving Organized Religion?

Lately, God seems to be showing me –through different sources– that it’s okay not to go to church. Before you get all offended and think I’m leaving the faith, hear me out…

I’ve had issues with “church” (or, as some prefer to call it, ‘organized religion’) for many, many years. I have encountered way too much hypocrisy & legalism, and have never felt comfortable going to church every Sunday morning. I was practically forced to go to youth group as a teen, and then had issues at 2 of the 3 different churches I’ve attended in the last 20 years… issues that couldn’t just be overlooked, and so I left. My current church is definitely better than the other two were, but it still makes me uncomfortable, to an extent.

Just recently, while browsing in a bookstore, I came across a book called “Pagan Christianity” by George Barna & Frank Viola. I didn’t buy it, but just picked it up and skimmed through it. And, it piqued my curiosity. Here’s the description (from Amazon):

Have you ever wondered why we Christians do what we do for church every Sunday morning? Why do we “dress up” for church? Why does the pastor preach a sermon each week? Why do we have pews, steeples, choirs, and seminaries? This volume reveals the startling truth: most of what Christians do in present-day churches is not rooted in the New Testament, but in pagan culture and rituals developed long after the death of the apostles. Coauthors Frank Viola and George Barna support their thesis with compelling historical evidence in the first-ever book to document the full story of modern Christian church practices.

The book has gotten me intrigued, and I fully intend to read it as soon as I get a chance (probably late November, or December of this year).

Then I picked up a book from the local library that I originally had no intention of reading: “The Year of Living Biblically” by A. J. Jacobs. An online friend reviewed it, and that review prompted me to give the book a try, and see what I thought. Well, I thought it was a fantastic book, and it got me thinking even more! What really got me, though, was the revelation I took away from that: Nowhere in the Bible does it say we have to attend church (in a building) every week!

People have always loved to quote me Hebrews 10:25, saying this was the mandate that we are to never stop going to church. Well, guess what? This verse does NOT say you have to “go to church”… it just says you aren’t to neglect meeting with other believers…

“Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” ~ Hebrews 10:25, NIV

“Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching.” ~ Hebrews 10:25, KJV

“And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.” ~ Hebrews 10:25, NLT

See? Even in the King James Version (which is thought to be one of the most reliable — closest to what was originally written), it says not to neglect meeting together with other believers. But it does NOT say you have to meet in a church building.

Then, while online the other day, I came across yet another book: “So You Don’t Want to Go To Church Any More?” by Wayne Jacobsen. And, by Googling the author, I came across his website, LifeStream.org, where you can read a multitude of articles on why he no longer is a fan of “organized religion”, and about how he believes “church” means something different than what we have always believed it to be…

Mr. Jacobsen says “Church is not somewhere you go; it’s something that you are“. We, the followers of Christ, are His ‘church’, His bride. Wherever we are to be found, that’s where “church” exists.

And I really like this concept!

I’ve been reading some of the articles on this LifeStream website, and apparently this is a growing trend… people are leaving the church building — the Sunday morning gatherings — and they are seeking out other believers that they can learn from and grow with, believers who share their same belief that you can’t limit God to man-made traditions.

Personally, when I realized that the Bible doesn’t even say you have to “go to church”, but only that you have to continue meeting with other believers, I was so relieved! No longer do I have to give in to the guilt that’s heaped upon me when people ask me if I’m going to church regularly, and I have to say ‘no’. No longer do I have to accept the shame they try to instill in me for not going. Instead, I can relax, knowing that I make my weekly Bible study meetings a priority, and am thereby obeying the Biblical command to continue meeting together with other believers.

I’ve purchased a copy of “So You Don’t Want to Go to Church Any More?“, so stay tuned, as I’ll be posting my thoughts on what the book has to say!

Pursuing Wellness Check-In: Week 5

Checking in for the end of week 5!…

Share one wellness success and failure from the week.

Share one wellness goal for the upcoming week.

Share one significant point learned from completing the Begin With Christ homework.

Share your weight loss, if you so choose.

Share one way others can specifically pray for you in your pursuit of wellness.

1a) Success(es) this week: I’ve started keeping track, on a calendar again, how I’m doing. If I stay on plan for the day, I give myself a green dot. If I do some things toward my plan, but slip a bit, I get a yellow dot. And, if I really fall off, and don’t follow my plan at all, I get a pink dot. So far, the week’s been a good mix of green and yellow, with a couple of pinks. So, that means we’re progressing. I’ve had more days where I at least *tried*, so that’s a ’success’ in my opinion.

1b) Failure(s) this week: Several times, this past week, I was just plain rebellious, and ate when not hungry, fully knowing what I was doing. I just said, “I don’t care — I’m doing it anyway“. I’ve got to stop rebelling like that, and remember that my body is God’s temple, which I should be treating with respect. Also, I haven’t done my Bible studies at all this week, and that disappoints me.

2) Wellness goal for upcoming week: I want to continue to pay attention to my hunger signals, and try to do so at EVERY eating occasion, not just some. ((same as last week)) I also need to be more attentive to the spiritual side of things… I have really let that go, and yet, it’s the most important part!

3) I haven’t done my THIN WITHIN lessons this week, either, so I don’t have any “insights” to share. I plan to sit down for a while, today, though, and catch up a bit. Not because I have to, but because I want to.

4) Please pray that I will continue to really focus this week, and do what needs to be done… and, continued prayers for our financial situation (and hubby’s return to school) would be greatly appreciated. It’s our biggest source of stress, right now, and that doesn’t help in the eating department (for me, anyway). Thanks.

The Motions by Matthew West

This song is so powerful… “just okay is not enough“… that’s the line that gets me.

Are you just “going through the motions” of a Christian life? Or, are you living every day in the abundant life God has for you?

“I don’t want to spend my whole life asking,
what if I had given everything
instead of going through the motions?
~ Matthew West, “The Motions“

If you want to make a commitment to stop going through the motions, click here to go to Matthew’s specially-created website for this purpose!

Pursuing Wellness: Week 4 Check-In

Checking in for the end of week 4!…

Share one wellness success and failure from the week.

Share one wellness goal for the upcoming week.

Share one significant point learned from completing the Begin With Christ homework.

Share your weight loss, if you so choose.

Share one way others can specifically pray for you in your pursuit of wellness.

1a) Success(es) this week: There haven’t been all that many “successes” this week. But, I *do* have a renewed motivation to really focus on things, and I have had a day or two where I did just that. So, that’s a mini-success, anyway.

1b) Failure(s) this week: I waaaaaay overstuffed myself on 3 occasions this week (hubby had a birthday, so we were eating with family — away from home — and the food was too good!). Not fun. I need to keep in mind that I hate that feeling of being overstuffed, ’cause I can’t enjoy my visiting with others afterward if I feel like garbage.

2) Wellness goal for upcoming week: I want to continue to pay attention to my hunger signals, and try to do so at EVERY eating occasion, not just some. ((same as last week)) And, I’d like to stop snacking in the afternoons, as an added “goal” this coming week! Lastly, I need to get back to doing my “homework” — my Bible study — for this challenge! (see below)

3) I haven’t done my THIN WITHIN lessons, this week, so I don’t have any “insights” to share. I need to pray that I will be more focused, and just do the homework — no excuses. This week my “excuse” was that the kids are home, and it’s just too hard to find the time — plus, I’ve been working a lot of hours, and then had review books to get to in my “spare” time. God should be coming FIRST, before all of that! So, this is another goal for the coming week (see #3, above!).

4) Please pray that I will really focus this week, and do what needs to be done… also, that depression will not derail me. We’ve been going through some really stressful times, recently, so depression often leaves me floundering, and I don’t feel like doing much of anything, most especially avoiding emotional eating. Thanks. ((repeating the same request from last week, as it’s still applicable)). Also, would love prayers for our financial situation… hubby’s trying to get things sorted out as to whether/not he’ll be able to go back to school in the Fall, and we need the loan stuff to fall into place for that to be possible. Pray that he and I will trust that God will make it happen if it’s to be. Thanks.

On to another week!

Pursuing Wellness: Week 3 Check-In

Checking in for the end of week 3!…

Share one wellness success and failure from the week.

Share one wellness goal for the upcoming week.

Share one significant point learned from completing the Begin With Christ homework.

Share your weight loss, if you so choose.

Share one way others can specifically pray for you in your pursuit of wellness.

1a) Success(es) this week: I managed to eat only to “satisfied” a couple of times — by paying attention to my hunger cues so I could stop before stuffing myself — and I managed to wait for hunger a couple of times, instead of snacking out of emotions.

1b) Failure(s) this week: There were still a lot of times where I reached for food when I wasn’t truly hungry, and Thursday was an all-out rebellion… I purposely bought a Coca-Cola, when I said I wasn’t going to drink any more of those (they’re terrible for my health!)

2) Wellness goal for upcoming week: I want to continue to pay attention to my hunger signals, and try to do so at EVERY eating occasion, not just some.

3) I’ve been working my way through the THIN WITHIN lessons, instead of Begin With Christ, because I don’t have the BwC book. So, the thing that most influenced me out of this past week’s homework is… the pendulum swing. I keep going back and forth, and back and forth, between paying attention (“doing well“), and not paying any attention/eating mindlessly (“failing“). And, it gets really tiring. I’m exhausted, and ready to get off of this rollercoaster, once and for all! Time to stop waiting for the miracle cure, and just do the work necessary to get myself healthy!

4) Please pray that I will really focus this week, and do what needs to be done… also, that depression will not derail me. We’ve been going through some really stressful times, recently, so depression often leaves me floundering, and I don’t feel like doing much of anything, most especially avoiding emotional eating. Thanks.

On to another week!

Pursuing Wellness: W3, D3

 (Thin Within – Lessons: Day 3, Week 3)

GOING DEEPER ~ Do you feel as if you’re held captive by food and eating? How has this area of life kept you from doing all that God has planned for you?

Yes, I feel as though I’m held captive. I hate that I’m often unable to participate in activities with my kids because of my weight, or my lack of endurance/strength. I don’t volunteer for things because I’m either too self-conscious or too tired.

BIBLE STUDY ~ Read Jeremiah 29:12-14a. What does it show you about God’s deliverance from any captivity you may be experiencing? Read Jeremiah 31:3, Ephesians 1:5, and Zephaniah 3:17. Write down what these Scriptures say about God’s view of you, and His plan for your life.

Jeremiah 29:12-14a ~ He will end our captivity and restore our “fortunes”. He’ll gather us from faraway “nations” and bring us home.

Jeremiah 31:3 ~ He loves us with an everlasting love and draws us to Himself.

Ephesians 1:5 ~ He adopted us into His family, and He was pleased to do so.

Zephaniah 3:17 ~ He lives among us; He is a mighty savior; He takes delight in us; He calms all of our fears; He rejoices over us with singing.

KNOWING GOD BY HEART ~ Find synonyms for the word “love”… How do these words give you a deeper understanding of God as love? Read 1 John 4:8-10,19 and John 3:16. What do these Scriptures tell you about God?

LOVE = cherish :: devotion :: adore

God cherishes and adores us, and is devoted to us, His children.

1 John 4:8-10,19 ~

• God is love, so if we don’t love, we don’t know God
• God sent His son to die in our place to show His great love for us.
• real love = God loving us and offering up His son in our place
• v.19 ~ God loved us first, thereby enabling us to love others

John 3:16 ~

• God loved the world so much that He sent His Son to die in our place so that we could spend eternity in Heaven with Him.

GETTING PRACTICAL ~ Keep the phrase “when in doubt, leave it out” in mind as you wait for hunger. It’s easy to convince yourself that you’re hungry when you may in fact be at a 1 or 2 on the hunger scale. Prayerfully invite God to direct you when you’re uncertain or in doubt. Make a prepared plan for those times of doubt, so that you’ll be ready when you’re bombarded by the overwhelming desire to eat.

My Plan: If I’m not really hungry, I will distract myself by any one of the following activities:

• blog / check emails
• journal
• do Bible study homework
• practice my Spanish
• go for a walk / do my workout

Pursuing Wellness: W3, D2

(Thin Within – Lessons: Day 2, Week 1)

GOING DEEPER ~ This week’s lesson refers to a performance-based pendulum swing. One side represents the pride associated with an ability to lose weight through sheer self-effort, and the other side depicts the extreme of giving up on the weight loss effort and eating everything in sight. Have you had any experience with these two extremes? How does this cycle contribute to a feeling of hopelessness?

I’ve been on both ends, and it wears you out to be constantly swinging back and forth. One minute you  think you’ve got it all figured out, and the next you’re having a pity party where only you and the cheesecake are invited. :-&  When you flop back to the “I give up” side, it feels as if you’ll never learn; as if you’ll always struggle with this problem.

BIBLE STUDY ~ God uses His living and active Word to convict us and call us to righteous choices (Hebrews 4:12). Read Ephesians 2:4-9. Note the things God has done for you. According to verse 4, why has He done all of this? Read Ephesians 1:3-8 and replace the word “us” with your own name. Try to put into words how all of these verses speak to your heart.

God has… loved us so much :: gave us life through Christ’s sacrificial death and resurrection :: raised us from the dead :: seated us in the heavenlies :: united us with Christ :: pointed to us as examples for future generations :: saved us by His grace.

v.4 ~ He did this because He loved/loves us so much, and because He is rich in mercy.

Eph.1:3-8 ~ my response: It is SO much more powerful when you insert your own name into the verses! I really feel that this was done for me, and not just for “everyone else” alone.

KNOWING GOD BY HEART ~ We continue to grow in our knowledge of God by looking at 1 Corinthians 13. Since God is love, replace the word “love” in verses 4-8 with “God”. Record how God reveals Himself to you. Use this revelation of God to guide you in worship of Him.

“God is patient and kind. God is not jealous, or boastful, or proud, or rude. God does not demand His own way. God is not irritable, and He keeps no record of being wronged. God does not rejoice about injustice, but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. God never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance… God will last forever!“

My response: “God keeps no record of being wronged“, and yet, so often I feel like He’s hanging onto His anger over something I have done, and that I have to keep trying to make it up somehow…that I have to appease Him.

GETTING PRACTICAL ~ Journal as you reflect on the last twenty-four hours. As you’ve paid specific attention to your body and your hunger numbers, what have you discovered? Have you been able to find “0″? Write down your body’s specific indications of hunger…

Well, I wasn’t really attentive to my body’s hunger signals today… I ate mindlessly, and gave into cravings when I knew I wasn’t really hungry. BUT, having former experience with this (having paid attention on other days), I know that my body’s signals of true hunger start with a fuzzy-headed feeling (or, lightheadedness), and then a headache and shakiness. Sometimes I get a growl in my stomach, but not usually. It’s the lightheadedness/headache/shaky thing that always lets me know I’m going to need to eat real soon. If I get to the headache, I’ve gone too far (waited too long).

Finding “0″ is never a problem for me, really. I recognize that very easily. It’s the stopping at “5″ thing that I always seem to have trouble with.